Are you victim of your own mind
It's the human tendency to, seek support. Be it emotional, financial, physical, or whatever. All of us are bound to our psychology that compels us to get inclined towards the support. Although it sounds so simple, but practically its much more complex.
In every human mind there is a need for something, and in every other person there is the source to fulfill this need. The only problem is finding the perfect compatibility.
Lets take an example, one person who was being bullied in his school days, seek for the friendly and supportive person who cares for him. But the fact is not all the friendly and supportive person will care for him. Even possiblity is that, this friendly and supportive person is in need of some other kind of support himself, which in this case the first person is not capable of. So we can see that no mutual support and compatibility is achieved and thus, human mind starts rebelling against its own principles.
I am sure it all sounds much boring, but trust me all of us need to understand this if we really think we should be more understanding towards people surrounding us.
Lets take an elaborate example, considering a good looking girl in her mid 20s, from middle class family, with good financial condition, but only thing she doesn't have is a good friend. Although, in this era of social media we can make as much friends we would like but more than fifty percent of them are just for names, and other twenty five percent are fake profiles. Also considering the fact that most of the friend request she recieve are from unknown guys who are generally in search of girlfriend. Which mean they not just need her friendship but more. Infact, after a certain time and some bad experiences, she figured it out that most of the friend requests she recieve is out of her self interest so she starts ignoring them. So she is still somewhat alone.
Now consider a not so good looking guy, who is also in his mid 20s, from lower class family, but better financial condition, have many good friend, but he lacks some true emotional support. Which means he need some kind of deep relationship with intense understanding.
Now situations works in this way, the guy gets friends suggestion showing the girls profile, in an instant he has deep within assumes her as the one he has been lacking. And sends her a friend request. What will happen now ?
Answer is pretty clear but think again. As for sure we know that his request will be pending for eternity. Because she don't know him or his intentions. While here, the guy will assume that his request was denied because of certain drawback of his personality, like his no so good looks, or his low class etc. Which actually is not the truth. Considering his own assumption the guy will have certain choices to make, either move on and accept the things as they are or grow hard hearted for handelling such a heartbreaking moments further, or either give a little push through some other media for the girl.
Before jumping to the choices the guy makes lets get back to the situation now, trying to understand the situation we can also consider about the girl. She can also assume somewhat similar concepts about the guy.
Leta say, the guy chooses to move on and both of them are on their own sapetate track. But they will never stop looking for filling the gap in their life that was lacking. The girl made many friend but still no one was able to place them self on that position. So she is still alone. The guy is in relationship but here too he has not found the deep understanding what he was looking for all along.
No one was wrong here, but their own mind played them out. The girl was fed up of the friend requests so she didn't bothered for the person who was trying to come in her life. While the guy who took thing a little egoistically chosed to move on and leave her alone. And thus they missed the chance to get what they were looking for all along their life. Had the girl been a little patient, she could have found a wonderful friend and a great partner or had the guy been a little pushy to get the girls attention he would have got what he had been seeking for.
I took this example because this was the simples way to allow me to make it understandable for you. Moreover social media is one of the most popular and strong media, not just for friendship but for wide range to information sharing and much more.
As I have said in the begining, it is the tendency of human mind to seek for, what it needs. Even if it has to play with our mind to fake it's very existance.
We are not ready to accept that what we are looking for is so easily available. So, our mind plays it to ignore the available solution, so that we keep on looking. Giving ourself a motive to go on in life.
They became the victim of their own minds.
But you have your choices, think wisely. Be understanding, and first of all understand yourself what are you and what you seek in your life. Clear your thoughts and stay alert. Who knows, that what you are looking for is in front of you and you are unable to see it.
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